My vow

If we were birds I’d have a nest for just us and every winter we would fly south together

having the cool air run through our feathers and glance at each other close to the sunrise

If we were inanimate objects I’d stand still beside you even while it rained

If we were nature I’d be the sunlight to warm your petals

Aiding in your process of photosynthesis

But since we are just humans

I’ll be your shoulder to cry on, your conscience in times of uncertainty, your muse in times of depression

Your motivation to continue, Your diary for your deepest darkest secrets

And if you ever need me for something else

I’ll adjust myself to fit those needs

I vow to be your everything and more…

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The first movie we watched together

 

Life has presented me with buffet styles

Love instigates fights that I lose so many times

Times you want to run away don’t you or in my case huddle in a dark corner somewhere

But something holds on somehow in my subconscious

 

Smiles present but sometimes its as if I have been programmed to smile

Expected to be nice so I forget the pain or maybe just pretend I do

But every now and again there comes the harsh reality that kicks me off me feet when I am alone-

and it reminds me of just that, that I am alone

Somehow I happen to be alone even with everyone around

Is it that something is missing?-

is it that the person that should be there isn’t there?-

or is it that maybe I am not where I am supposed to be?

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Those lines aren’t typos but I just really want to put on paper what my mind has

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Sorry I did it again, my mind goes blank when I try to explain what I am feeling

Dear reader please excuse my silence

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But in some weird messed up way, dear reader I think you know exactly what I am trying to say.

 

 

Away I am, Away is where I am

Look at me metaphorically my life is leaving me, a chunk of my existence flying over the ocean departing further and further away

Away, is not just a word for me but an adjective, a verb, a noun

since a big chunk of me is flown away like  a paper plane made by a 5 year old

since a chunk of me is away…drifting as we speak

since if you ask where I am, I’ll tell you a piece of me is away

Look at me metaphorically, there is no me, I am away

 

reality is I am continuing to work, socialize like everything is normal trying to keep up with the world spinning on its axis

but metaphorically, the real me, the big chunk of me is away.

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Bye ger :( see you in so many months

 

throw me breadcrumbs

Running towards doors that remains shut

constantly evolving to fit into an already filled space

Seeking solutions for puzzles not yet defined

Running in circles while the other you robotically follows the rules: conform

Looking for that light at the rainbow, even though the rainbow itself is missing

How can you look out for the end when you have not yet defined the destination

Strolling along like another ripple in this big ocean

-unnoticed

 

Your turn to play

The universe likes playing mind games with me

Love is a maze

Life is a gamble

Sex is a job

Crime is a hobby

Good is now boring

I can either throw a dice and play in this sick game

or I can do what painters, poets, performers and all the others referred to as geeks and freaks do

“I ‘ll create my own universe, life isn’t standard, so I’ll change the world, one poem at a time”