Movin’with the punches

Maybe we will make it until tomorrow

At this point I am willing to start with at least that

Even though you are not really good for me…you still seem like a pretty good bad idea

Trigger finger

Words of anger being thrown on RIPPED paper

with Sharpened points to PIERCE a pure white slate-

they are SPLASHED across the pages like the remains from a mighty SWORD.

Exhaling through my palms what you are too DEAF to HEAR.

SCREAMING from my thoughts; the SILENCE is deafening.

Writing ANGER through my trigger FINGERS

google image

Since everyone is too busy to listen…

Naked

 

 

Inspred by this song

Removing anything that might prevent me from seeing it, touching it, I don’t want to imagine what if, what it would be like, what it might look like, feel like, taste like

Take it off…everything, shed yourself in your cocoon and evolve in something else that I want to indulge in. I want you Naked… I want to unleash my thoughts with no limitations, no boundaries and don’t you dare ever tell me to stop.

Take… it…. off
Don’t let me ask you again
This is as nice as I will ever get

Yes… that is more like it. that adrenaline…that sound of your heart beating in harmony with my pulse racing as the curtains are drawn
I just want this more than anything else..no interruptions no conversations..there is no room to doubt that you want this just as much as I do

Love me without guilt..let this be your biggest risk
Unleash it on me, no regrets…shed yourself of anything that might hold you back
Love me like your emotionally naked.

Naked

Removing anything that might prevent me from seeing it, touching it, I don’t want to imagine what if, what it would be like, what it might look like, feel like, taste like

Take it off…everything, shed yourself in your cocoon and evolve in something else that I want to indulge in. I want you Naked… I want to unleash my thoughts with no limitations, no boundaries and don’t you dare ever tell me to stop.

Take… it…. off
Don’t let me ask you again
This is as nice as I will ever get

Yes… that is more like it. that adrenaline…that sound of your heart beating in harmony with my pulse racing as the curtains are drawn
I just want this more than anything else..no interruptions no conversations..there is no room to doubt that you want this just as much as I do

Love me without guilt..let this be your biggest risk
Unleash it on me, no regrets…shed yourself of anything that might hold you back
Love me like your emotionally naked.

If only …then just maybe

I’d write that I am smiling because I have a reason to write
That your smile is my muse… I close my eyes and have a flashback ..then the ballads flow
Like that champagne cake…or that river side I keep picturing us

If I had a reason to write

I’d write that as I lay on my bed..peeking through my window I form images of us in the clouds
That I randomly smile even in the middle of a bad news, creeping the hell out of my friends
If I had a reason to write…I’d have you…

But reality is …..I don’t …so I’ll just make another status that gets lost in the world of notifications because there is no reason to write…. there is no “YOU”

—-Discover the heart lost in jigsaw puzzle and you may win a prize—-

Colors of Life -Novel

I am relaxed by the soothing music of the birds, they sing in unison as though I’ve been chosen as their audience.  Their varying colours brighten not only the fruit trees but somehow my heart.  Surrounded by the fruit trees and flower buds of spring…I glance at the rainbow complimented by the warm sunshine …I lay en-wrapped by the ripples of the river, as I float I stare at the clouds trying to figure out the most odd shapes God had created; it is just me, alone with nature, alone from pain, I feed only happiness here; I am at peace here, I am home here.

“Yuh nah get up? …wake up!”

“Mummy just five more minutes, please”

“No, get up, yuh late fe school an a yuh fuss day”

“Mmmm… cho man”

I am faced with the harsh realities of life again, there are no birds here only the piercing sounds of obscenities, vulgarity, violence, there is no unison, and there is only chaos; Thoughts of suicide, hate, and unhappiness.  Awakening means living here, living here means dying.  Normally one speaks of home, they call it something, label it somewhere with an address, a number, a lot, some description of parish or country.  I have heard the varying descriptions of home… I tend to ask “How long does it take you to live somewhere in order to call it home?”… I guess I lived many places but I have yet to find home.

I’ve heard that through an education you can escape poverty, become independent, be your own boss, I haven’t questioned it much, I am in a position to take anything as long as it means an escape. (Crystal Blake)

 

This is an excerpt from my novel-“Colours of Life” it documents the experiences of a little girl on her growth to something great. Like a Potter creating beautiful vases from clay…so too can a star rise from the earth. I see myself as a metamorphic Phoenix, above all obstacles we can rise.  I hope you enjoy my novel in its entirety soon and I hope too that it becomes a success story for you and yours. 

The love letter

Dear Cupid,

You lied, love was never as good as you made it seem, That arrow you shot me with was loaded with bullets. No it didn’t give me eternal love, rather wounds that my doctor cant seem to find the cure for, a terminal illness that eats me away everyday, Maybe by the time you receive this letter I will be ‘dead’.

Dear Santa,

They cant seem to find a heart to replace the one i tore, you see cupid lied to me, he made me trade my emotions for an experience of tears, i live my life through dreams and keep missing what life has to offer no matter how early i wake. All my life you never visited my home, I assumed its because i didn’t have chimney, i’m now 20 but im trying to work on it. But should December come and you cant find my chimney could you bring my fresh pack of heart at the nearest post office convenient to you.

Dear Future Boyfriend,

Your taking too long, you leave me with no clues, no idea of what you look like, so i give all these dream takers a chance trying to eliminate my way to you. But I am tired, they look at me with hungry eyes as i stumble along the broken pavements.

Dear Love,

I hate you.

Yours truly,
Crystal

….

To you its just us sitting here…
For me its starting forever just by seeing my future in your eyes

To you life is dynamic and filled with surprises
For me …you are my life and nothing else matters when you are here

To you happiness isn’t guaranteed
For me you are my source of happiness, my only true reason to see the world with purpose

To you love doesn’t exist
But as i sit here looking at you, starting forever, seeing as my source of happiness, my only reason to have the world with purpose….I see different
For me I am in love with you.

I cant play anymore

Roll my heart
Fold my lips
Pass my smile
its a game of life

I am a mere entertainment
music that lasts for 3 mins and 40 seconds
That youtube video with just 30 views
29 of which are my own
That song no one felt was worth air play
so i make my own play list and listen to myself

Roll my heart
Fold my lips
Pass my smile
its a game of life

A wish is what keeps me here
A mere hope and single dreams
Pretending that i’m someone the world sees
But in truth i am no more than 3 mins and 40 seconds
Having no fan mail but i walk a red carpet in my mind

Roll my heart
Fold my Lips
Pass my smile
I am nothing but a game in your eyes.

I just cant….love you

I cant love not because i wont but because can’t
I cant because I am scared
I am scared because I’ve been hurt
I’ve been hurt because I was deceived
I was deceived because I trust
I trust because I care
I care because I love
I love because I am stupid
I am stupid because I love
I cant love because I cant
My heart just cant run through those lines anymore
Unless you can be the one to love me first …
I might just love you back
But don’t ask me to love first because I cant